When you started dating with a guy. You see all the goodness on him. He makes you laugh and can melt your heart with a smile. All the positive side has been viewed. Then the two of you get married and have a happy family. And you live happily ever after.

BUT after the AFTER, the reality attacks. Being pregnant is not easy and the hormones were at peak. You have sleepless night and tired body after giving birth..The sweet guy that you had is not sweet at all. He snapped at you. Yell at you. Let you do the laundry and laughed at your cooking skills.


You feel abused and used but the truth is. In marriage, you need to compromise. You can’t go out anytime you like, because you have kids who needs you the most. You have a husband who constantly needs you by his side to watch the children because he can’t do it alone. Yup! And they call us “housewife” not the wonder woman who wears the sexy outfit that can throw you out of the window with a smooth moves.

Anyways, let me share you my journey of motherhood. I’ve got Nikus at 2015 and just a few months I was pregnant with my twins. I don’t know what to feel. And it doesn’t help a bit that we also have a marital problem with my husband. You know how strong and firm your heart is, when your capable of agreeing of saying YES when you wanted to say NO. And you should never understood a certain situation unless it happens to you. Bravery sometimes, is accepting that you have shortcomings and you also need to understand your partner, not just simply listening. So here’s what I learned in my journey.

  1. Take good care of yourself. If it means you need to buy creams and products to make you feel good, then go! You only have one body.
  2. Tell your partner what you feel. Never assumed he knows everything about you.
  3. Listen to what his telling to you. Don’t be defensive. Allow him to say his side.
  4. If you needed to get fresh air, then seek help. You can asked your relatives or your partner to take good care of the kids while your away.
  5. Your human. If you needed to shout or cry and whatever you feel like doing, DO IT. It will keep your sane to let it out. You have your kids. They needed a mother who can take good care of them.
  6. Share your passion with your partner. It can be cooking, swimming, or playing Mobile Legend. Yes! you also needs to have time with each other.
  7. Live life. Be the mother your kids wants to be remembered. Be a reliable partner. Be trusted. Be bold. Never settle for less because you’ve been told so. When someone asked me, why you needed to get that far, or why don’t we go nearby for certain events. My answer will be, Why not? I have feet that can walk for miles and I have kids that I’m running after. The world is so big outside the house, so why stay in cage?
  8. Never forget to be a kid at heart. Be happy. Always.
  9. Trust God. He knows what’s best for you.
  10. Save money. Trust me, it helps a lot. No one can scare a woman who has money on his bank account. Money can’t buy happiness but being broke cant bring you anywhere either.

So there. Being patient and stubborn is a perfect combination. If I’m not patient enough, I wouldn’t have a family that I can call my own. If I let my husband walked away from our lives, I wouldn’t see how loving and caring he is to our kids. I’m stubborn because I will always allow my kids to explore the world instead of playing toys that most of the kids do. I wanted to create good and happy memories.

How about you?

What have you’ve done to keep your family from falling apart?

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